Some of the greatest dubbed, one-liners from classics...

[DrNgor]

Yasuaki Kurata in Return of the Deadly Blade: "You think you can beat me with your two-bit kung fu?"

[ShaOW!linDude]

From Jackie Chan's Shaolin Wooden Men

"Shaolin's fate will depend on our dumb friend." 

But the best line goes to the villain: Lieutenant: "We've brought a present for you." Victim: "A present?" Villain: "I've brought the gift of death."

 

From Jackie Chan's Snake & Crane Arts of Shaolin

Ting Bro.: "Brother, it seems like we're famous." Chan: "You're not famous. You're simply well known." Ting Bro.: "There's a difference?" Chan: "Of course there is. You're not famous at all. You're notorious. You're thugs."

Chan has a # of great English dubbed lines.

"I have this bad habit. I like to fight people who fight well."

"I am quite smart, but still, not nice. The nice die young because they're not smart."

"Money's a nuisance. And women are as well. I never bother with either."

"Mr. Wong, don't be cruel. Cruel people die young. What's more, I'm a lucky guy. I'll outlive you."

[DrNgor]

35 minutes ago, ShaOW!linDude said:

From Jackie Chan's Snake & Crane Arts of Shaolin

 

"You let go, or I'll curse you!"
"You go ahead! I like nothing but a good cursing match. I'm a real expert."
"Shithead! You goddamn stupid son of a bitch!"

"Don't move, or he dies!"
"Goddamn it! Wong Yee-Fu, you're a crafty swine!"

[Daxtreme]

Mortuary Blues:

"Damn you, ass ghost!"

 

[DragonClaws]

 

Quote

"Uncle why are you so interested in the princes Kung Fu?"

"Because I like Kung Fu, and I like to expand my knowledge of it"

The Buddha Assinator(1980)

[Killer Meteor]

On 2/22/2019 at 1:45 PM, DrNgor said:

"You let go, or I'll curse you!"
"You go ahead! I like nothing but a good cursing match. I'm a real expert."
"Shithead! You goddamn stupid son of a bitch!"

"Don't move, or he dies!"
"Goddamn it! Wong Yee-Fu, you're a crafty swine!"

You're a real thief. First the book, and now my money - damn yer!

[Omni Dragon]

From The Assassin (1967):

"I'm the prime minister here, I'd like you to remember that, I don't need any advice on what's best for my country." 

Edited October 11, 2019 by Silver and Gold Dragon

[Killer Meteor]

Very timely!

[Jay Stone]

This one from The Leg Fighters is great!

[Killer Meteor]

Return of the 18 Bronzemen - "My, my...Uncle, you're a most resourceful creature, you know that?"

[northern b]

wow this thread still going!?

That’s really something! (a line used in many films)

[Killer Meteor]

FIST OF FURY

"How could a healthy man die?"

"You shut up!"

[Killer Meteor]

Some ammusingly nonsensical non-sequiters

 

THE KILLER METEORS

"Who does it belong to now...the fabulous pearl?"

 

HALF A LOAF OF KUNG FU

"What's this?"

"Well then, you sneaky bastards!"

"Hmph! And why not?"

[starschwar]

These two stuck out in my viewing of Zu: Time Warrior

 

"The Blood Monster?"
"Yes.  It feeds on blood."

Could have never figured that out, thanks.

 

And:

*Yuen Biao walks into a cavern filled with countless human skulls - they are very clearly human skulls and could not possibly be mistaken for anything else.*

"What are these?"

[starschwar]

From Game of Death 2:

 

Billy Lo:  I'm ... (hesitates, checks script)... Lee Chen-chiang.

[sifu iron perm]

The entire scene with Alphonse Beni and his Wife in Black Ninja, super cringe and hilarious. 

 

 

Edited July 2, 2022 by sifu iron perm

[Cognoscente]

The fish shop owner's running gag about Ah Chi* in Thundering Mantis: "You're gonna be the death of me."

Legend of a Fighter...

The cook/challenger: "You bet, you old half-wit."

Same guy: "You want me to leave? My wife would laugh me out of bed."

Rich bully: "Your dad is just a bag of old wind."

Kong Ho-San: "One has to kill when one's own life is in grave danger."

Eagle claw challenger talking about the school sign: "My own view is you should tear it down and try to make a new door out of it."

Fok Yuen-Gap: "You should thank the gods you're still alive."

Opium master makes a mouth-to-bum joke: "Cheek to cheek just like sweethearts."

He makes another double-entendre: "Just let me wind you up, kid."

* I'm reminded of Archie - a nickname for Archibald, which means genuine and bold.

[starschwar]

Fantasy Mission Force

 

*A character who had previously spoken with a gruff American accent is suddenly replaced by a different voice actor with a refined British accent.*:  (I am) English Major General, Robert...

Edited July 6, 2022 by starschwar

[Ah_Tao]

On 7/2/2022 at 6:13 AM, Cognoscente said:

Legend of a Fighter...

The cook/challenger: "You bet, you old half-wit."

Same guy: "You want me to leave? My wife would laugh me out of bed."

Rich bully: "Your dad is just a bag of old wind."

Kong Ho-San: "One has to kill when one's own life is in grave danger."

Eagle claw challenger talking about the school sign: "My own view is you should tear it down and try to make a new door out of it."

Fok Yuen-Gap: "You should thank the gods you're still alive."

Opium master makes a mouth-to-bum joke: "Cheek to cheek just like sweethearts."

He makes another double-entendre: "Just let me wind you up, kid."

* I'm reminded of Archie - a nickname for Archibald, which means genuine and bold.

You forgot the best one!

Eagle claw challenger: "Old man, you're looking very ill...."

Fok Endi: "Fuck you!!!"

 

Edited July 7, 2022 by Ah_Tao

[Cognoscente]

It's okay but the best profanity comes from the rich bully: "Fucking cunt-face, you had enough?"

It's so weird to hear the C word in an old Kung Fu movie.

[Chorake]

JC in The Killer Meteors:

"Only you could get that drug, and kill that bitch as well, because you are a man, and a very special man. She does like to surround herself with special men."

Edited August 23, 2023 by Chorake

[starschwar]

9 minutes ago, Chorake said:

JC in The Killer Meteors:

"Only you could get that drug, and kill that bitch as well, because you are a man, and a very special man. She does like to surround herself with special men."

A related line that has always stuck around in my mind:  "... because she likes men.  Lots and lots of men!"

[Killer Meteor]

1 hour ago, Chorake said:

JC in The Killer Meteors:

"Only you could get that drug, and kill that bitch as well, because you are a man, and a very special man. She does like to surround herself with special men."

That gravelly voice coming of youthful Jackie is hilarious.

[PandaPawPaw]

My favourite bit of the English dub for The Big Boss is -

Ice Factory foreman to BL: 'Hey, well did something happen?' 'Why you standing there like dumb OX!?' 'Stupid farmer!

[Chorake]

10 hours ago, PandaPawPaw said:

My favourite bit of the English dub for The Big Boss is -

Ice Factory foreman to BL: 'Hey, well did something happen?' 'Why you standing there like dumb OX!?' 'Stupid farmer!

"Don't you want job?!?!"

"..."

"Doing what?"