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The Weird Kung-Fu Movies Thread


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Morgoth Bauglir

Dragon Lives Again is a crazy one. The story is about Bruce Lee going to Hell and fighting his way out. He teams up with the One Armed Swordsman and Popeye the Sailor and they fight Zatoichi, James Bond, Dracula, The Godfather, Emmanuelle, and other people.

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Yeah, that's a weird one... The part where he first arrives in Hell and they are examining his body... They "imply" he died with an erection, only to discover his Nunchucks as the mysterious 'bulge' under the sheets near the groin area. :D

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Morgoth Bauglir

that was really funny. I like the explanation they give of why he doesn't look like Bruce Lee. When you go to hell your face and body change. Makes perfect sense! :D

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One Armed Boxer

A couple more Shaw Brothers films come to mind, mainly Holy Flame Of The Martial World, and for insanity on a par with Buddha's Palm you need look no further than Demon Of The Lute, words can't even describe where to start with this one...giant hovering disco ball's, ginger afro's which grow out of nowhere, character names like 'Long Limbed Evil' & 'Old Naughty'...

Outside of Shaw Brothers I'd recommend Shaolin Invincibles simply for the gorilla and long tongued wizard scenes, Jade Dagger Ninja for the crazy ending which is like an old school version of the finale from Story of Ricky (aka Riki-Oh), The Clones Of Bruce Lee, & Bruce Lee: The Invincible for further gorilla madness and Chan Wai Man, who you can never really go too wrong with!

Is there a print of Zodiac Warriors available anywhere?

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The reason I turned out to be such a disturbed individual is because I watched The Real Bruce Lee from a young age. Yep--I thought kicking rocks was normal, though was confused by a lot of other things in the movie.

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The Yuen films are crazy, so is Drunken Dragon. Shaolin Youth Posse is weird, has Ricky Cheng bursting out of a rock to fight Sam the Seed, a vampire guy and drunken beggar! Ninja vs Shaolin Guards is a weird one with Lo Rei and Mike Wong.

A few other weirder ones are Five Fighters from Shaolin

Raiders of Wu Tang

Kung fu Zombie.

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I would go for The Dragon, The Hero as one of my fave craziest. The reverse photography is bloody weird, the musid is pure psychedilia. Also the scene where Chan Lau gets his his meat and two veg ripped off by a dog is VERY strange! This is the movie where Jonh Liu and Tino Wong face off against Phillip Ko, with his weird flailing arms, vomiting techniques

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Good list of movies!! The Dragon, the Hero sounds interesting...

I just watched about 1/2 of Taoism Drunkard by Yuen Woo Ping and I have to say the Watermelon Monster is giving me nightmares! And the Ratmobile was just ...WTF!

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gravedigger666

Snake Fist Dynamo-There was maybe one fight in movie,cover looked brilliant and I fell into trap.Utter Joseph Lai silliness.

Heaven&Hell-Quite Obscure

Fantasy Mission Force-wtf....

Some Chor Yuen movies go over the top but because in his movies locations and costumes are always extremely stylish will forgive him a lot for millions subplots and faults in storylines.

Iron Bodyguards-Fists of Legends....I think this has 2 movies in one???

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KUNG FU BOB

Here's a few ODD ONES THAT CAME TO MIND:

THE CRIPPLED MASTERS -It's like a rip-off of CRIPPLED AVENGERS but with real physically handicapped performers on low, low budget. The scene where the guy with no arms spins a staff on the little bone stubb where his arm should be made my jaw drop to the floor!

WOLF DEVIL WOMAN -If John Waters and Chang Cheh took acid together and co-directed a movie, it might look like this. A hunted married couple douse their baby in their own blood to keep it warm, then create an avalanche to cover it from the pursuing Devil Man. Then a wolf (played by a German Sheperd) saves and raises the baby in it's surprisingly well decorated cave. She grows up to be a kung fu femme fatale that uses giant bird talons on the end of a rope (or chain, I forget) as her main weapon. When she gets mad her hair turns white. Yes, a version of the story that would eventually be remade as THE BRIDE WITH WHITE HAIR. Love this movie.

THE BOXER'S OMEN -Every minute of this film is ODD!

THE MIRACLE FIGHTERS -Yuen Woo-ping going totally cookoo for Cocoa Puffs.

And what was the one from the same time period that had the turtle? Is that TAOISM DRUNKARD?

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KUNG FU BOB

It's certainly cheesy, with low budget FX and cartoon animated lightning and such, but it never stops being entertaining. Pearl (the star) has personality to spare, she's a hotty, and does a great job in the action scenes. If want it and you can't find it, pm me.

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Is Snake Fist Dynamo the one where people are looking for a hidden treasure vault and then they get attacked by a boa constrictor inside it?

General Stone - The son of a statue, which leads a brigade of living statues that guard the emperor's tomb, goes out to avenge the emperor. There is also an unexplained wizard that pops up at random times to teleport people. It's not that good of a movie though.

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A lot of those ninja movies in the 80s were odd, especially Robert Tai's Ninja:The Final Duel.

But the oddest one, which was totally unexpected, was that freaky kung fu film with I think John Chang and Dean Shek and there's some half man/half praying mantis monster in the flick. Something Deadly Mantis - it was put onto DVD by GZ and then VA. That was like a Twilight Zone episode.

KFS

I know what movie you are talking about. I've seen it as well. I think the title was Mantis Fists and Tiger Claws of Shaolin.

I also thought LITTLE DRAGON MAIDEN was a bit odd as well. Leslie Cheung and Mary Jean Reimer-Lau as the titular Little Dragon Maiden, who is also some kind of big bird creature.

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SlothStyleKungFu

WOLF DEVIL WOMAN -If John Waters and Chang Cheh took acid together and co-directed a movie, it might look like this...

Pearl Cheung rules. "Dark Lady of Kung fu, Matching Escort," but especially "Wolf Devil Woman" where the zany is on another unashamed level. Speaking of which Linn and I were talking about it on another forum and he said he'd PM me an article?, interview? regarding Pearl Cheung's true life craziness but he never got around to it. :(

'12 Fairies aka '12 Animals'. No question about it. A far more demented take on the premise behind the already demented Zodiac Fighters...

Odder than "Zodiac Fighters?" Must... see... this... film.

I know what movie you are talking about. I've seen it as well. I think the title was Mantis Fists and Tiger Claws of Shaolin.

Yep, thats it. Mostly the movie is weak but the premise combining a kung fu flick with a monster movie is killer.

"Lady Iron Monkey" of course has one of the weirder heroines (and actually the stars performance is a redeeming factor of the flick). The "Three Swordsmen" flick with Andy Lau and his buddy the killer whale makes me want to boil my brain every time. And, not a martial film per se, but the kung fu fight between a dog and a cat in "The Cat" might be the greatest thing in the history of HK fantasy weirdness.

The Bruce Clones delivered a few good ones- Dragon Lee ripping out belly-buttons in "Enter the Invincible Hero," the ape fighting of "Bruce Li in New Guinea," the confusing cut and paste trash of "Bruce Lee Versus Supermen," the bathing suit area bashing of "Bruce Versus Gay Power," and, probably the ultimate "Dragon Lives Again" which is just jam packed with weirdness.

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It's certainly cheesy, with low budget FX and cartoon animated lightning and such, but it never stops being entertaining. Pearl (the star) has personality to spare, she's a hotty, and does a great job in the action scenes. If want it and you can't find it, pm me.

thanks man, I just found it on hkflix for 4.95, certainly worth the price for my curiosity

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Morgoth Bauglir

THE BOXER'S OMEN -Every minute of this film is ODD!

Not a kung fu movie, but still a great movie! One of my favorites from The Shaw Brothers.

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here's a few of my favorites:

Inheritor of Kung Fu- easily one of the most nonsensical, random, incoherent movies i have ever seen. it defies description.

The Boxer's Omen- really bizarre, yet strangely entertaining supernatural shaw bros. movie with Philip Ko.

The Last Duel- confusing as hell swordplay movie with more subplots than cast members!

all of those IFD produced cut-and-paste ninja movies are masterpieces of mindless insanity and come very highly recommended for fans of trashy movies.

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Morgoth Bauglir
here's a few of my favorites:

Inheritor of Kung Fu- easily one of the most nonsensical, random, incoherent movies i have ever seen. it defies description.

Maybe John Ladaski's (the white guy) best role:p

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I'll just put in another voucher for Taoism Drunkard. Its got the Ratmobile!! Crossdressing!! The Cannonball Monster!! Thinly disguised pedophilia!! Random costumes!!

Your head will hurt after watching this movie, promise.

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